people lots lots lots say " can not control situation but can control reaction " … so want shout out for people who can not , actually .
people who have meltdown because " small " thing go wrong - always bigger than people believe .
people who get angry and defensive when someone try bully and hurt - can not " just " ignore like everyone say .
people who feel actually violent when something upset - who need time and place to go hit things , so that not hurt people .
people who can not understand how stay calm and walk away - who instead get frustrate and say shut up go away .
and anyone else who relate to this - that can not control how react , not so easy like that .
is not bad person to not be able control reactions how people expect .
there is benefits in have skill , but , not deserve to beat self up for not have skill . people should support if or when try learn , but also , should support even before learn , give outlets and patience .
some people will forever have less skill , because brain physically can not adapt and learn right . some people have episodes and crises where control impossible . still do not make bad person . still deserve support .